Dreams Forgotten
by Ilona19
Summary: Sequel to Letters From the Heart, Angel is human, but Buffy is married to someone else. A night in LA leaves Buffy pregnant with Angel's child. What will happnen?
1. Part 1

Title:   
Author: Kat  
Email: strawberrisweety15@yahoo.com  
Disclaimer: You all know that I don't own any of the characters except those that I made up.  
Description: The sequel to "Letters From the Heart." Angel is human, Buffy is married to Jeff. Willow and Tara moved to San Franciso. Anya and Xander are in New York, Buffy and Jeff are in Ohio, and Giles is back in Sunnydale. Angel is still in Los Angeles, and so is Dawn who lives with her father and her step-mother, Kalie. Dawn is human, now, not the key. Faith is out of jail and in Sunnydale. She is the slayer and Wesley is her watcher.  
Feedback: Yes, please.  
  
~~~  
  
"Buffy."  
...  
"Buffy?"  
...  
"BUFFY!"  
Buffy opened her eyes and looked up at Jeff.  
"What is it?" she asked  
"You just zoned out on me." he said smiling  
"Tired." Buffy explained  
"I can imagine," he placed his hand on her stomach, "In a few weeks, we'll be parents."  
"What time is it?" Buffy asked  
"Just after 3."  
"Willow and Tare are-"  
"Going to be here soon. Don't worry. The plane was probably late or they're stuck in traffic." Jeff tried to calm her down  
"You're right." Buffy said, "You're right, I shouldn't worry."  
Jeff leaned over and kissed her softly.  
"I love you so much, Buffy." he told her  
Buffy smiled.  
"Me too." she said  
  
I sit in my little apartment. There really is nothing to do, now that I'm human. All the times I had imagined being human, sitting alone in a dark apartment while the woman I love is living across the country, married to someone else, was the last thing I thought would happen.  
I still hadn't talked to her since... that night.  
She had come to me and we talked.   
It had been a lot like when I became human after fighting the mohra demon.   
I had tried to remember that she was married, but couldn't help wishing that it was me. That I could wake up every morning seeing her beautiful face.  
And when I kissed her... she kissed me back. And she told me everything. That she didn't love Jeff, that she had never stopped loving me.  
We made love that night. And she left. She must hate me.  
I should have... known better. Maybe we could have... somehow...   
But now it's too late.  
I get up and walk outside. The sun still bothers me a little, even after 10 months. Los Angeles hadn't really changed much. Except for the lack of demons, but that doesn't bother most people. Another law firm moved into the Wolfram & Hart building. Haven't been causing trouble. At least none that I heard of, but then again, I lost most of my connections with the demon world.  
Sometimes I miss it. Having something to do. I miss everyone. Cordelia, Wesley, Gunn. Wesley's back in Sunnydale, watching over Faith. Cordy's doing her actress thing, and Gunn...   
I look at the grave. Charles Gunn. It seems so cold and distant printed on the stone.   
"I'm sorry." I say, like always, "I wish... If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride."  
I don't know where that came from. My sister used to say it, before... before I killed her.  
I sit down on the cold ground next to the grave and cry. I haven't done this since the day I became human.   
I cry for Gunn, and for my sister. For my mother and for my father. I know he ment well. I cry for Jenny. She tried to help... I cry for Drusilla, for what I did to her. And I cry for Buffy. For the pain I caused her.  
  
  
  



	2. Part 2

  
  
Part 2  
  
Buffy walked into the baby's room. She looked into the crib. Her three day old daughter slept peacefully.  
"Robin Claire Shaffer." she whispered.   
Everyone said that she looked like a mix of Buffy and Jeff, but they were saying that only because she looked like neither. She looked like Angel and Buffy.   
"I love you." Buffy said  
"I love you both." Jeff put his arm on Buffy's shoulder, "She looks like you. She has your eyes, and your mouth."   
"She has her father's eyes." Buffy insisted, looking at the soulful brown eyes.  
"No, I have blue, you have brown." Jeff insisted.  
Buffy just smiled.  
  
  
  
"How is she?" Willow asked after Buffy and Jeff came downstairs.  
She and Tara were sitting on the couch in the living room.  
"She's sleeping," Buffy said, "She's such a good baby."  
"Buffy can we talk?" Willow asked  
"Umm... can we talk later?" Buffy asked. She knew what Willow was going to say, and she wanted to avoid it as long as possible.  
"No, it's important." Willow insisted  
"OK, fine." Buffy lead her upstairs into the bedroom.  
"Willow..."  
"No, Buffy, let me talk." Willow stopped her, "Jeff loves you, you can't keep lying to him. And what about Angel? Doesn't he deserve to know he has a daughter?"  
"Willow, I don't know what to do." Buffy said, "I'm trying to put everyone before me, but everything is just messed up." she sat down on the bed, "I know Jeff loves me, and he loves Robin, too. And I don't want to hurt him, but if he knew what I did... and that Robin isn't his... I know what I did was wrong, but a part of me would never change what happened. I have Robin Claire now."  
  
Just then the door bell rang.  
"Buffy! It's Xander and Anya." Jeff called.  
"I'll be right down." Buffy said, wiping the tears from her eyes.  
"I'll go see them." Willow said leaving the room.  
  
Buffy walked over to her desk and took out her address book. She found the little piece of paper that Angel had sent with his address and phone number when she first went to LA.  
She dialed the number, and waited for someone to pick up.  
"Beep. This number has been disconnected. A new number has been unspecified. Thank you."   
  
Buffy put down the phone, discouraged.  
  
  



	3. Part 3

Part 3  
3 months later  
  
Angel walked down the dark city. This was what he needed. To get away. To find someplace new. This was what he needed to stop thinking about Bu- ..... her.  
He saw a couple walking across the street. Holding hands. Giggling. Kissing.  
He turned away.  
"Stop thinking about her." he said, "She's married. It's a sacred oath, you can't expect her to break that."  
But he knew that she had broken it. A year ago.  
  
Buffy sat in the rocking chair, holding Robin Claire to her shoulder. She was alone. Jeff was at work, Dawn was out shopping, everyone else had gone home. She looked at her baby, thinking about what happened almost exactly a year ago.  
"Will I ever stop feeling guilty?" she asked out loud, "I know what I did was wrong, but... then I wouldn't have you."  
"Burp." Robin Claire said  
"That's a good girl."  
  
  
  
Angel walked into the little motel where he was staying. In his room. he took off his shirt and dropped it on the nearest chair.  
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. He walked over and opened it.  
"What are you doing here?" he asked  
"I came to talk to you."  
"Why?"  
"Because of my sister."  
"What does Buffy have to do with this?" Angel asked  
"Everything." Dawn replied, "You love her. She loves you. And you're human."  
"And what does THAT matter?" Angel asked, " She's married, if you hadn't noticed!"  
"And I also noticed that she has a baby that looks like you!"  
"What?"  
"Buffy has a three month old baby." Dawn said, "Do the math. Robin Claire is 3 months old, Buffy was pregnant for 9 months, you get 12 months. A year ago, Buffy was in LA. So were you. Nine months later, she gives birth to a baby that looks exactly like you. Coincidence?"  
"Buffy... had a baby?" Angel asked  
Dawn nodded her head.  
"Wait, how did you find me?" Angel asked  
"I saw you walking on the street, I just followed you." Dawn explain, sitting down on the chair.  
"And you're doing what is Ohio?" he asked  
"You don't know?" Dawn asked, "I thought you came here to see her." she laughed.  
"See who?"  
"Buffy. She lives here."  
  
  



	4. Part 4

Part 4  
  
Author's Note: I know these are very short, but I get impatient for feedback.  
~~~  
  
Angel sat alone in the tiny hotel room. The knowledge that he had a daughter was very hard to comprehend.  
Ever since Dawn left, he had been sitting here, wondering what the best thing to do would be. His first impulse was to find Buffy and his daughter.   
Robin Claire....Shaffer.   
But she wasn't his daughter...not really. Jeff was doing everything a father should do.  
He wished it was him.  
"Maybe if I had told her..." he said to himself  
  
  
"YOU DID WHAT???" Buffy screamed at her sister, "What gave you the right? This is my life, Dawn!"  
"I was trying to help." Dawn replied calmly  
"Help? Dawn! How is this helping? What am I supposed to do, now?" Buffy asked, "Robin Claire has a home, a family. And now that Angel knows about her..." Buffy turned around and leaned on the table  
"You don't know what it's like, Buffy!" Dawn insisted  
"What what is like?" her sister asked  
"Growing up without a father! You were 16 when they got a divorce, you didn't really care!  
"What?" Buffy looked up at her sister, "I didn't care? Dawn, I'm the reason Mom and Dad got a divorce. They started fighting when I found out I was the slayer."  
"Nuh-uh! It was my foult." Dawn insisted  
"They loved you, Dawn! They were glad to have one normal daughter, instead of a slayer, they-" she stopped, "But that doesn't matter. Robin Claire has a father. Jeff. And he's a good father."  
"So? He's not her real father. What will you tell her when she's older?"  
"Nothing. She doesn't need to know-"   
Just then the phone started ringing. Buffy grabbed it,   
"Hello?"  
"Buffy?" asked a familiar voice  
"Yes, what's wrong, Giles?" Buffy could hear the worry in his voice  
"I'm sorry to call you with bad news, but we have a problem in Sunnydale." Giles told her.  
  
  
  



	5. Part 5

Author's Note: This is one of the first times I ahve used beta readers, so big thanks to Spaceghostess, J.A.I.T., Just Me.  
  
  
  
Buffy slowly walked into the magic shop. She looked around at the people gathered there. Giles. Wesley. Willow. Tara. Xander. Anya. Cordelia.   
Buffy, how are you?" Giles asked carefully.   
I'm... OK." Buffy replied.   
everyone looked at her, not sure what to say. She walked over to the table and sat down next to Willow.   
"So what's going to happen now?" she asked   
"The funeral." Wesley replied,   
"We made the arrangements already."   
"You OK?" Willow asked, putting her hand on her friend's shoulder.   
"It was just so fast." Buffy said,   
"I never got to say goodbye."   
"I know." Willow agreed   
"And I never got to say that I ... forgave her."   
Everyone was silent.   
"I should have been here. If both of us were fighting, she would have been OK." Buffy insisted   
"You don't know that, Buff." Xander said, "And you have a life. Jeff and Robin Claire."   
"But still--"   
"The Council dismissed you, Buffy." Giles added,   
"You are 23 years old. That's longer than any Slayer has lived. And you were dismissed so that Faith would become the real Slayer, and she did."   
"And she *died*!" Buffy exclaimed   
"That's what happens, Buffy." Willow said, gently, "You're the exception."   
"So what now? Am I the Slayer again?"   
"No, another has been called." Wesley told her   
"Who is she?" Buffy asked   
"We don't know, only her Watcher does." Wesley explained,   
"I'm sure we'll find out in the near future, though."   
  
A few hours later, Buffy walked down Main Street, carrying Robin Claire.   
"This is where Mommy lived, sweetie." she said to her daughter, "But this is a bad place. Now we're safe because it's daytime, but when it's dark, bad things happen."   
She looked into the shop windows as she kept walking. She turned onto a smaller street. Revello Drive. A short while later, they reached the house. Buffy took out her key and unlocked the door.   
"This was where Mommy lived with Aunt Dawn, and your Grandma Joyce."   
Inside, all the shades and curtains were closed. Buffy placed Robin Claire in the crib that had been set up earlier that day.   
"Your Aunt Willow did all this." she said to the baby, then went into the kitchen and picked up the phone. After dialing the number, she waited for someone to pick up.   
"Hello?" a familiar voice asked.   
"Jeff? Hi." Buffy said.   
"Hey honey." Jeff replied, "How are you?"   
"OK, I guess. I just got home. You have the number, right? Just call me anytime."   
"OK…how's Robin Claire?" he asked   
"Good. Everyone loves her. She's a little fussy, but you know..."   
"Yeah."   
"How's everything in Ohio?"   
"Same as always. I wish I could be there for you, Buffy."   
"I know, but it's OK." Buffy said, "All my friends are here. And I'll be home soon."   
"All right, I'll talk to you soon." Jeff said.   
"'Bye." Buffy hung up the phone. She leaned on the table, tired from everything that had happened.   
"Cute baby." said a familiar voice.   
Buffy spun around.   
"What are you doing here?" she asked, "It's daytime, how did you get in here?" "I've been here since morning." Spike replied   
"What? Why?"   
"I've been staying here. I hope you don't mind." Spike walked into the living room and stood next to the baby crib.   
"Of course I mind! This is my house!" Buffy insisted as she followed him   
"It's not like you're here that much."   
"That's not the point!"   
"And why do you have Angel's kid anyway?" Spike asked, "I thought you were marrying Jeff what's-his-name."   
"How did you- It's a long story."   
"Vampire senses." Spike explaimed, "She's cute. Can I hold her?"   
"No!"  
"Why not? I won't hurt her."   
"OK, fine." Buffy picked up her daughter and handed her to the vampire, "Be careful. Don't drop her."   
"Calm down." Spike looked at the miniature version of Buffy. "She's perfect."   
  



End file.
